Grill&Bar
February 22, 2013
OK, so wife is still away, her flight was delayed she will be here when she gets here… house is fairly clean, dishes are done. In all honesty, this week was not a hardship at all, the kids are at a great age to help out and are on autopilot most the time. It is amazing what a difference 3 years can make. We went out to eat, I let them pick, and this is where we ended up. Not my first, 10th or 50th choice but they like it, why I have no idea.
Anyway, I ran into a few people today that told me they have read the posts… to answer the questions I keep getting asked, yes I really posted these publicly 3 years ago. Each was written on the day it says and most of it is true. One person I spoke with in particular might realize her husband is mentioned in day four, I failed to mention that when we spoke. He plays the part of the un-named the sick coach – I believe he had the flu that caused my morning from hell. Funny that I saw her today. To be honest this was my favorite day of the series. Here you go: Day 4.
Seven Days Without a Wife: Day 4 – February 2009
2:12am – Can not sleep. The boy woke up at about 1am yelling for Mommy… the funny thing here would be to say I ignored him, since I am not Mommy, but I do not want everyone thinking I am a bastard (more than you already do). I went to see why and he said he was being eaten by ants… red ones. That was fun. Then about 1:50 he yelled… for Mommy again… this time to help him get out of bed and go to the bathroom… seriously, why? Said it was too dark, apparently Anna stole his night light. Tomorrow we buy more night lights.
Once he got back to bed I started to cough, and well now I can not stop. I will never get back to sleep.
3:52am – Still awake, still coughing. Watched some “how to live green” show and they talked about your family’s environmental footprint, and how paper plates can be really bad for the environment… I do not need this pressure.
Going to take Nyquil, hate the sh*t but it works; only problem is it makes me dizzy for hours. Maybe I will just drop off Danny at basketball, they will be fine without me, I am only there to assist.
8:41am – The director of the basketball league called (woke me up, I knew it was for me because Danny instead of answering it yelled up the stairs “Daddy it’s not Mommy”), the Coach is sick; I have to coach the 25, 7 year old boys. I suck at basketball, this is why I am not a coach, I only help out because it is a lot of kids. Guess what the Nyquil still working, I mineswell be high… not good.
11:15am – I learned some very interesting stuff I think I already knew this morning. All 7 year old boys are the same. The arguments and frustration I have had all week with MY boy, I just relived with 24 of his clones. What does “hold the ball mean”? If you were holding a basketball in a basketball court and an adult, an adult coach who is 3x your size, came to you and said “Hold the ball, do not bounce it” what the hell would you do… I, I would HOLD the ball. Maybe make sure it does not BOUNCE! Seems simple, but for most of the time I was there I had to keep saying “hold the ball”, over and over and over… “hold the ball”. I looked one kid in the eyes, down at his level and asked so very nicely to hold that ball, while I am still looking him in the eye, he dribbled it… right there… I took, I took it out of his hands and rolled it to the wall. He looked very shocked and sad, I laughed a little. But if it was not “Hold the ball” it was “Don’t touch him”
I had a group of 12 boys, in 2 lines 6 each running parallel 10 feet apart. In each line, each boy kept punching the “balls” of the kid behind them. Not the basketball… the “balls” (their words not mine) “Coach Tim… “Bobby” keeps punching me in the balls…” WHAT THE HELL! I am stoned on Nyquil, suck at basketball, sleep deprived, and begging 7 year old boys not to destroy the groin of the boy next in line…
4:15pm – No one is here, just me. Anna is at the birthday party, Danny is at his friends. It is quiet, no one is touching, yelling, crying, laughing, mocking, irritating, breathing, looking, snapping, whistling, singing, playing, anything… What am I going to do? Ha… laundry. But I have an idea, I am going to take out anything that is Barbie’s from the load to save water since she is not here. This will counter off the paper plate use this week… brilliant – I should send an email to that green show! And then put half the kids clothes from their hampers back in their drawers, they won’t know. Oh yea, I went to the store, bought 2 night lights, 5 pairs of gloves, ant spray for the boy and a dishwasher sponge on a stick thing… I am ready!
9:36pm – Left my Ipod at work on my desk – yesterday. Did not realize this until about 6:30 tonight. So instead of donating it to the cleaning crew (if they had not taken it already) I figured we would go for a ride. The kids thought it was cool to see the giant corporate office all dark and empty. It is amazing how impressed a kid can be with a cubical; imagine if I had a door! Danny’s head would explode. Got the Ipod, went to cold stone, got some ice cream, made it home before the snow, had a good night. Funny how ice cream fixes everything. Over half way done.
tr/trp